I AM ME, WHO ARE YOU??? DUH..

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Mae Jacolo Aguilar”apple”, B.S. Nursing from West Negros University (2010)

Why are people two-faced, fake, narcissistic and deceptive? Are they born that way or is it a choice?

Two-faced? fake?…deceptive?All of the above, YES. A true narcissist embodies them whole-hearted-ly.

I have read this wonderful article, What Causes Narcissistic Personality Disorder? — Bridges to Recovery and here are some of their insights that you need to ponder upon.Narcissistic personality disorder emerges from a confluence of genetic factors and environmental influences. Exposure to abusive, overly demanding, or permissive parenting styles in childhood is the primary cause of narcissistic personality disorder, which is a cover for deep-seated self-esteem and self-confidence issues. Narcissistic personality disorder sufferers are lifetime underachievers who struggle to build stable relationships, but with comprehensive, long-term treatment narcissists can become more self-aware and begin to make positive changes in their thoughts, behaviors, and attitudes.”

This is why we would always recommend “Therapy sessions” from a licensed Professional. However, to set the right expectations, Narcissists are more likely to backslide after a while. Even therapy cannot reverse this damage to the person’s self- esteem, but may offer ways of reminding them from time to time and help them regulate their Narcissistic behavior. Assuming of course that your Narc is willing to accept his/her mental condition, otherwise Therapy would be useless..

According to Yes, Narcissists Can Change. Here’s How by The Little Shaman;Contrary to popular belief, narcissists can change. They cannot change or heal their narcissism, but they can — and do — change their behavior. The problem has never been that narcissists cannot change. The problem is that the narcissist is generally unwilling to change. Changing a behavior means that the narcissist must admit this behavior was wrong, and they are generally unwilling — or even unable — to do that. “

This brings us to the question, “why are they fake? “Narcs have low self-esteem. These are people who have been consistently bullied by their own families. The very people they look up to and counted on to protect them were the ones putting them down since childhood.

Imagine being a helpless innocent child surrounded by monsters terrorizing you all the time. The child will turn to him/herself for comfort — inner-self

This is the only hiding place for such a fragile being that would assure safety but at the same time cause detrimental effects to their mental health. This is simply not how it is supposed to be. A child has been wired to lean on to the guardians for safety and breaching this natural process would damage the child’s sense of security. Parental guidance is crucial for the child’s mental development and given the wrong environment the child is bound for early tribulations in life.Children are not mature enough to go through this and they will soon give in..This is where and when the mind evolves to it’s pathological state. — irreversible damage

Once they have reached this point early in life, meekness/kindness would be stripped off of their system. As these two positive traits represent their weak child-like image. They would now begin to view them as nothing but signs of weakness.

They would resort to deviating from who they really are. Attempting to separate themselves from their true nature(kind/meek self) which connects them to the painful memories of being put down as a child. As a result of not amounting to anything or never measuring up to their family’s standards. This old self(the narc’s real identity) becomes an embodiment of them being bullied and therefore should be eliminated. This is the only way for an abused child to survive.Deviating from the real-self means giving up their true nature. Thinking that by doing so things would become different and their guardians would be more forgiving this time around. These poor children are forced to become the person they are not. — fake

They will carry this on to adulthood making them, ‘TRUE NARCISSISTS”.

Deception is part of their game in everything because it plays a huge part of who they have chosen to become.Narcissistic people feel that without deception the same thing that happened to them as children is bound to happen once again — ptsd

They are constantly in fear and re-living those horrid memories and that is what makes them mean to others. Playing and acting tough is more of like “scaring the crows away” thing. Inside this hard shell is nothing but a mushy, soft and easy to crumple stuff. — just a teary -eyed child.

Adulting is the hardest for these people. Expect to deal with a menacing child who whines and throw tantrums any way they would like. Only this time as an adult, Narcs are very concerned about their public image because this is all they have got and they are holding on to it. In fact, they are hanging on by a thread right there and so if you by chance cut that thread expect no less than a rant” from the NARC.

While healthy people may see nothing wrong in being straight forwardly stating their points-of-view to your face, NARCS on the other handdeceptive as they are,don’t fight fairThey cannot deal with just about anything truthfully.

They usually appear very agreeable but behind your back is where they become aggressively disagreeable. Yes, we are still talking about the same narcissistic person, with two faces, that is.They may use ploys such as smear campaigns, pitting people against each other, making dumb comments on social media under a bogus name and a picture of an EGG, traditional or cyber stalking people and beyond.. All of these are done behind a smirk on their faces and along with it is that usual “taking the higher ground”act.

SOCIAL MEDIA ACCOUNTS OF NARCISSISTIC PEOPLE ARE USUALLY TOO GOOD OR WHOLESOME TO BE TRUE. — just sayin

You may see these NARCS trying so hard to keep up with societal expectations. They are usually the ones who choose to follow stupid traditions even if it means sacrificing ethics. The result is toxic relationships, bacon for breakfast and co-dependency. There is nothing glamorous about having two faces at the same time. Marilyn? more of like a freak from the freak show circus, at least to me.

EQUATION:TRADITION=ETHICS/MORALS=POPULARITY GAIN=EXISTENCE=LIFE OF A NARCISSIST

By all means, very fake and aesthetic. But wait, we should not stop there. Being fake and aesthetic requires a tremendous amount of energy — useless effort

They actually believe that up to this point people are convinced by these phony acts — magical thinking

No.

People know. They just stand by a NARC because they need something in return — ”birds of the same feathers”

Not to mention turning tables around the real supposed to be victims/successfully victimized people and accusing them of being aesthetic or the fake ones instead.Well, in truth you don’t expect escaped criminals to talk about their crimes in public, instead they choose to shut their mouths. — lesser talk lesser mistakes

In a nutshell, since Narcissistic people are fake, they lie.The only best thing to do is to identify the TRUE NARC..and truth has always a way of revealing itself — -KARMIC EVENT

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Mae Jacolo Aguilar”apple”THE MULTI- TOPIC BLOG- writes about personal interests& passion.specializing on HUMAN BEHAVIOR. elicits toxic reaction by annoyance.certified weirdo& a nurse.


Originally published at www.quora.com.

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